body aches on cold winter day,
as if all the life has been struck out of her,
muscles, tendons, joints, head all hurt,
its as if her ribcage was rung out with poison,
skeleton cannot carry weight of body,
the soul withers in and out skeleton,
like candle light flickering,
back buckled over, like crows bowing when orchestrating funerals,
soul struggles to stay in one place, sometimes escaping,
sometimes returning,
my body seems to be a vehicle,
hands don’t hold the steering wheel to navigate,
I have lost control while riding in the drivers seat,
displaced within my own body,
as if my prayers for death as a child are all starting to come true,
I want to be free.
Let me be free mama.