my Dreams run after Me,
Through my years of Hell,
Planted on New Moons,
Across shallow and deep Soils,
My fingers covered in isopods and springtails,
Fertile dirt ready to be fed,
Ready to Germinate,
But the Rain Season armed in darkness comes and wipes out my Intentions,
Even as I hold onto Seeds,
Even whilst the Water feeds me,
The same water bleeds me Out,
This Birth is painful.
My Spinal Stem is held together with Vine Leaves,
Bamboo as a Back,
My Dreams spun into my Ribs keeping me steady,
Heart releasing Seed,
Keeping my Body Steady
Birthing kept me Alive,
Trying to Grow, whilst sitting in Chemical Burn
Not Knowing i’m burning,
Nor that I’m on Fire,
Germinating amongst the Dirt,
Cha Cha would say, “we are scared of you”,
And I would ask ‘Why?’
My lack of Tolerance for Horror,
would bewilder them,
They Came for Me,
Stripped the Soil from the Ground,
Left me in a Lake of Water,
Left me Breathless,
Drowned in Fear,
Robbed me of His Death,
My father after my father,
Could not even say my Prayers over his Grave,
Instead I was left Frozen, electrocuted
Upon foreign Grounds,
Not Understanding what was happening.
My grave began being Dug,
Partly their hands digging,
The Other, my Own,
I still don’t know where my Eyes are,
My Feet are Lost,
Death began chasing me Again,
It never Stopped.
There is never any Peace here,
Even underground,
They say there will be no Solace,
It chases me even in my Sleep,
The earth doesn’t stop the Pain.
In the Ether neither.
But I am Here.
Silenced Screaming into a Black Hole,
I’m Vacuumed,
Left in another Space and Time.
Living Here.