So you’ve been gone for 9 months,
In 9 months the seed you left in the mud
Grew from ash into a rediscovered lady,
Your grave lays standing,
I still have not seen it in the physical,
Yet your body and spirit migrated across country and remained by my side,
I cannot forget you,
But my prayer of peace came to me,
I grieved you,
As if mother was for child,
I grieved like you did for several children,
But I grieved you as a daughter for mother,
Not as granddaughter for grandmother,
You were never grandmother,
A pillar of love in my life,
You were that,
Filled me with sustenance of life,
But never grandmother,
But like grandmother you died,
You had to leave,
Left the door open,
A gaping hole so profound it was as though my own organs could not cope with your death,
Grief poured out of every ounce of me,
I weeped on ground where you laid seeds
Now 9 months later,
A field is blooming,
I have found my own feet,
You wonder less in my thoughts,
More in scents, jokes, and objects,
You hover around me,
Watch me like a hawk,
But you too have slowly had to let the bird fly from nest,
I am flying Ama,
I am flying alone in the sky,
And my oh my,
The sky holds such colour…