It is challenging,
When no word can leave lips,
Cannot form sentences,
Only breath is left,
As I salivate.
To tell the truth.
Cannot lock eyes,
Neither engage with loved ones,
technology has become demonic,
I am wrapping up my loose ends here,
Setting them on fire to ensure there is closure,
A ribbon on any threads,
Pain has pillaged my hope.
I fooled myself,
and them,
In my mouth full of flowers,
And in the ecstasy of my skin ,
Some don’t look deep enough,
My eyes have dimmed,
Skin lost all colour,
Cannot bring myself to talk,
I have spent weeks sleeping,
Under covers,
or crying,
In hope change would come,
To mask the thoughts
To pretend that death that is not approaching,
Lord,
If I was tainted from birth,
Then what is my lesson to learn here?
This has become crippling,
Exhausting,
24 and obliterated,
From constantly fighting, accepting, forgiving,
and letting go,
My own demon is myself,
Cannot recognise my face,
Healing only to return to the sadness which resides,
I am frightened of the Numbness,
How the mind remains scattered, or sometimes clears,
Yet finds itself in a landfill of nothingess,
Ironically the acceptance of my departure has become peaceful,
A change might come,
Or my story might end here,